Archives for the month of: September, 2010

I decided to go fishing with my buddy,
But some girls showed up scaring all the fish away!

How to Make a Woman Happy

It’s not difficult to make a woman happy. A man only needs to be:

1. a friend
2. a companion
3. a lover
4. a brother
5. a father
6. a master
7. a chef
8. an electrician
9. a carpenter
10. a plumber
11. a mechanic
12. a decorator
13. a stylist
14. a sexologist
15. a gynecologist
16. a psychologist
17. a pest exterminator
18. a psychiatrist
19. a healer
20. a good listener
21. an organizer
22. a good father
23. very clean
24. sympathetic
25. athletic
26. warm
27. attentive
28. gallant
29. intelligent
30. funny
31. creative
32. tender
33. strong
34. understanding
35. tolerant
36. prudent
37. ambitious
38. capable
39. courageous
40. determined
41. true
42. dependable
43. passionate
44. compassionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

45. give her compliments regularly
46. love shopping
47. be honest
48. be very rich
49. not stress her out
50. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

51. give her lots of attention, but expect little yourself
52. give her lots of time, especially time for herself
53. give her lots of space, never worrying about where she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

54. Never to forget:

* birthdays
* anniversaries
* arrangements she makes

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY

1. Show up naked
2. Bring food

PANTIES ON A PLANE

There were three black ladies getting ready to take a plane trip for the first time. The first lady said, ‘I don’t know bout y’all, but I’m going to wear me sum hot pink panties before I get on that plane.

‘Why you going to wear them for?’ the other two asked?

The first replied, ‘Cause, if that plane goes down and I’m out dare laying butt-up in a cone field, they going to find me first.’

The second lady said, ‘Well, I’m a-going to wear me some florescent orange panties.’ ‘Why you going to wear them?’ the others asked. The second lady answered, ‘Cause if this hare plane is going down and I be floating butt-up in the oshun, they can see me first.’

The third lady says, ‘Well, I’m not going to wear any panties….. ….

‘What? No panties?’ the others asked in disbelief. The third lady says, ‘that’s right girlfriends, you hears me right. I ain’t wearing no panties, cause if this plane goes down, honey, they always look for the black box first..