Archives for posts with tag: men

8 Ways Men Try to Maintain the Upper Hand

Women control us.

They can catapult us into instant, spontaneous lust, and, at the same time, into a knee-buckling fear of rejection. The very thought of a ripe, firm body can tyrannize our thoughts, leaving us sweaty and panting and out of control. And the dangling promise of sex can have us jumping through every female hoop imaginable.

Not a good situation. As men, we need to learn to turn the tables on this kind of female domination; to regain the upper hand in our interaction with the opposite sex. So how do we do this? Here are a few ways to put you back in the driver’s seat in your dating life.

1. Wussy not

Desperation stinks, and women can sniff out insecurity. So even if you’re Brad Pitt’s better-looking brother, you still need to exude tons of confidence if you want to attract the ladies. This doesn’t mean arrogance or acting like a selfish jerk. It means living with a secure sense of your masculine self; a rock-solid belief in your own worthiness as a desirable man.

Don’t wussy out.

Wussy guys are always seeking approval from women ‘- paying for female attention, pandering to their every desire, acting as if a woman is doing them a favor by even talking to them. They are desperate for sex and terrified of rejection. They hover around the fringes, hoping to get noticed by available females.

Instead of asking women out, they give them their business cards, then wait by a phone that never rings. They allow themselves to be sex-ploited by women. In other words, they act like doormats, not men. The result? Women either lose all respect and get turned off, or simply take advantage of them.

Women love confident men. So even if you feel like jelly inside, act confident around the opposite sex. Have a plan for your life. Have a direction. Work out, eat right. Feel good about yourself. Be proactive in your relations with women. All this will show on your face and women will instantly recognize it.

2. No more games

Playing hard-to-get, not returning phone calls, seeing how many hoops they can make a guy jump through ‘- women love to play these games. Games empower women. They instinctively know how to keep men off balance and how to keep them coming back, panting for more. Every game a woman plays is a test in her mind ‘- she’s testing you to see how much you’ll put up with (in other words, how much she can get away with), how desperate you are for sex and how successful your dating life is (the more you tolerate her tests, the more of a dating loser you are).

So if you want to get the upper hand, you absolutely haveto call her on her games. If she plays hard to get, then tell her you have no time for it, and it’s been nice knowing her. If she doesn’t return your call, stop calling her. Most guys do the opposite ‘- when a woman makes herself unavailable, they double or triple the effort of their pursuit. They call 10 times a day. They send flowers. They show up at her workplace. They play right into a woman’s hands and surrender all control of the relationship. Don’t do this.

3. Keep it in your pants

Women know they can control men with sex. They know that most men will do anything for even a chance at getting laid. So if you want the upper hand, you have to be the master of your domain ‘- you can’t let Little Elvis lead you around by the nose. As soon as you need a woman, you’ve handed her total control on a plate. But if you change your attitude from needing to wanting, then you’ve taken a vital step toward upper-hand freedom.

So don’t jump when she offers sex. Don’t always be the one who initiates bedtime fun. If she starts playing manipulation games, act like her body doesn’t turn you on. If she knows she has you by the balls, it’s all over, buddy.

4. Don’t be at her beck & call

Women love a challenge ‘- as soon as they find out they can’t have something, they want it 100 times more. It’s the basic stuff of their psychology. So at the start of a new relationship, be a bit aloof. Don’t be a yes-man.

Take a page from her playbook and don’t return all her calls. Be busy. Don’t be available every weekend (and don’t offer explanations about your plans). Keep her wondering if you really want to be with her. Make her work for it ‘- this will keep the power balance out of her clutches.

5. Develop a new attitude

Putting women on pedestals may be great for them, but it’s dating suicide for guys. A lot of men act like a woman is doing them a favor by dating them, as if she’s a great prize they have to prove themselves worthy of attaining. In other words, women have what men want, and men have to work hard to get it. This is just another case of handing all your power over to women. So turn this around ‘- change your basic attitude. You’re the prize, not her. It goes hand-in-hand with your essential confidence.

6. Have a backup

Women love to get their way. They throw tantrums, they cry, they manipulate men with sexual blackmail. This is not to be tolerated, so at the first sign of any serious BS from your woman, be prepared to walk. If you roll over and wuss out, you’re doomed. She’s looking for control and you can’t afford to give it to her. At the start of a new relationship, the Upper Hand Guy always has a few strings to his bow, so before you get too involved, it’s not a bad idea to have a backup woman in your stable if your new girlfriend goes ballistic. This way, it’s easy to take a walk with the knowledge that you have somewhere to go.

7. Be awesome in bed

Unlike men, women can get laid any time they desire, simply by asking. But women are far more discriminating about their sexual choices than men are ‘- and they are looking for great sex. To maintain the upper hand, you have to make sure you’re a champion between the sheets. Most guys are so average in the sex department that if you know how to please her, she won’t want to lose you. This gives you excellent upper-hand leverage.

8. Make a ton of money

If you really want the upper hand, get rich ‘- you will have women kissing your feet.

Stay on Top

Women love to control relationships. And too many guys just wuss out and hand over all their power, letting their sex drive get in the way of any common sense. But it doesn’t have to be like this, as long as we guys make the effort to change the balance of this power, to take back the upper hand.

Ultimately, a relationship should not be about control, but about partnership ‘- a lesson that women will only learn if we take the upper hand and teach them.

http://www.ivillage.com/8-ways-men-try-maintain-upper-hand-0/4-a-283780

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Why Women Are The Worst Kind of Bullies

Women can be nastier bullies than men, at the workplace. What’s the best way to deal?

  

A Bully Free Zone sign - School in Berea, OhioA Bully Free Zone sign – School in Berea, Ohio (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

When Lady Gaga declared her hero was Emily-Anne, the 18-year-old pioneer of WeStopHate.org against teen bullying, I could completely identify. I had a flashback to my traumatic adolescent years. The memories alone made me feel like Emily-Anne could be my hero too

However, I didn’t expect bullying to be so prevalent at the workplace. Adults are facing it pretty tough, with woman-on-woman harassment on the rise. Thirty-five percent of Americans reported being bullied at work, according to a 2010 survey by the Workplace Bullying Institute. Women make much nastier office bullies than men, says psychologist Dr. Gary Namie, co-founder of the Institute.

Workplace bullying is four times more common than sexual harassment and racial discrimination, found the same study. Girls are taught to be critical about each other from adolescence, and it’s particularly vicious among working women; from playing favourites to badmouthing colleagues. Common careers where women face bullying? Law, finance or any other job where “women feel the need to be hyper-aggressive to get ahead in a male-dominated environment,” says Dr. Namie.

Debra Falzoi, a communications coordinator who was terrorized by a female boss at a Boston university, says:

“My female bully lied and gossiped about me and others. She used all indirect tactics. I have seen men also use indirect bullying tactics, but they’re much less frequent, and they have seemed solely to protect their ego rather than proactive moves to sabotage.

Falzoi eventually quit her job after reporting the harassment. Her boss did nothing, despite multiple complaints against the same woman.

Samantha Brick, a British journalist, wrote a story titled: ‘There are downsides to looking this pretty’: Why women hate me for being beautiful. ‘ It went viral, supplemented by comments questioning her beauty. Some readers even called her “ugly as a troll.” I’m not going to debate her story, but I thought the Financial Times Weekend published the best response to the media maelstrom. The controversy showed how women sabotage the careers of other women by being unsupportive, it said. The columnist highlighted “rope ladders,” where women climb to senior positions, then promptly haul up the ladder right behind them. While some tactically avoid helping other women in their careers, others can resort to passive-agressive behavior to protect their interests.

“Women bullies will often befriend you and then air all your secrets later, in boardrooms or at office gatherings. I’ve had patients that just can’t trust again after being humiliated like that at work,” says Dr. Namie. The problem persists, as there are no anti-bullying ethics or law in practice, unlike legal protection against sexual harassment or racial discrimination. Less than one percent of co-workers will stand up when they see their colleagues tormented, fearing their own jobs.

There’s only one truly effective way to report workplace bullying: treat it like a business problem. Dr. Namie says:

“Report to your superiors and make it a business case on how the bully is affecting your productivity and driving up absenteeism. The minute you talk about how emotionally traumatized you are, you’re unlikely to get any help.”

Your managers could brush it off by saying it’s a cultural difference or clash of ideas, he says. Follow your instincts if you think you’re in a hostile work environment, and report it the right way. The only time when you should leave your job without making a case is if you work in a small family-run business, according to him.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/worldviews/2012/04/30/why-women-are-the-worst-kind-of-bullies/

 

WOMEN SPEAK IN ESTROGEN AND MEN LISTEN IN TESTOSTERONE
… By Matt Groening (Creator of The Simpsons and Life in Hell)
Deep Thoughts about Gender Differences

SEX: Women prefer 30-40 minutes of foreplay. Men prefer 30-40 seconds of foreplay. Men consider driving back to her place as part of the foreplay.
MATURITY: Women mature much faster than men. Most 17-year old females can function as adults. Most 17-year old males are still trading baseball cards and giving each other wedgies after gym class. This is why high school romances rarely work out.
MAGAZINES: Men’s magazines often feature pictures of naked women.
Women’s magazines also feature pictures of naked women. This is because the female body is a beautiful work of art, while the male body is lumpy and hairy and should not be seen by the light of day. Men are turned on at the sight of a naked woman’s body. Most naked men elicit laughter from women.
HANDWRITING: To their credit, men do not decorate their penmanship.
They just chicken-scratch. Women use scented, colored stationary and they dot their “i’s” with circles and hearts. Women use ridiculously large loops in their “p’s” and “g’s”. It is a royal pain to read a note from a woman. Even when she’s dumping you, she’ll put a smiley face at the end of the note.
COMEDY: Let’s say a small group of men and women are in a room, watching television, and an episode of the Three Stooges comes on. Immediately, the men will get very excited; they will laugh uproariously, and even try to imitate the actions of Curly, man’s favorite Stooge. The women will roll their eyes and groan and wait it out.
BATHROOMS: A man has six items in his bathroom – a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream, razor, a bar of Dial soap, and a towel from a Holiday Inn. The average number of items in the typical woman’s bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.
CATS: Women love cats. Men say they love cats, but when women aren’t looking, men kick cats.
DRESSING UP: A woman will dress up to: go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, get the mail. A man will dress up for: weddings, funerals.
WEDDINGS: When reminiscing about weddings, women talk about “the ceremony.”
Men talk about “the bachelor party.”
SOCKS: Men wear sensible socks. They wear standard white sweat socks.
Women wear strange socks. Socks that are cut way below the ankles, that have pictures of clouds, that have a big fuzzy ball on the back.
NICKNAMES: If Gloria, Suzanne, Deborah and Michelle go out for lunch, they will call each other Gloria, Suzanne, Deborah and Michelle. But if Mike, Dave, Rob and Jack go out for a brewsky, they will affectionately refer to each other as Bullet-Head, Godzilla, Peanut-Head and Useless.
MENOPAUSE: When a woman reaches menopause, she goes through a variety of complicated emotional, psychological, and biological changes. The nature and degree of these changes varies with the individual. Menopause in a man provokes a uniform reaction – he buys aviator glasses, a snazzy French cap and leather driving gloves, and goes shopping for a Porsche.
THE TELEPHONE: Men see the telephone as a communication tool. They use the telephone to send short messages to other people. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.
RICHARD GERE: Women like Richard Gere because he is sexy in a dangerous way.
Men hate Richard Gere because he reminds them of that slick guy who works at the health club and dates only married women.
PLANTS: A woman asks a man to water her plants while she is on vacation. The man waters the plants. The woman comes home five or six days later to an apartment full of dead plants. No one knows why this happens.
CAMERAS: Men take photography very seriously

source: http://www.jokebuddha.com/joke/Women_speak_in_estrogen_and_men_listen_in_testosterone#ixzz1hcFAT0gU

10 Things Women Dont Like About Men

Everyone knows that a woman’s brain works completely different to a man’s brain, we think different when it comes to relationships or love.

Have you ever heard someone say? “All men are alike” , yet I bet you have, I heard that saying so many times that I thought it must be true then, because I would hear it from my mom, aunt, female friends, and just any women.

But then I saw a clear connection between that saying and the women that said it, most of the women I heard say “All men are alike” were because they had bad experiences with men in the past. Most women that said that around me were because they were cheated, abuse or other reasons that made them not trust men or having the misconception that all men are the alike.

Well how do we really know if all men are alike? How about the most commonly hated things a women don’t like about men, and make your own conclusions after you read them.

For Men: Read each one carefully and see if you have done any of them

For Women: See if you have come to the conclusion that all men are alike because of this 10 things.

1. Feelings

Women in general like to talk, they are socially open towards others, they make friends easily and express their feelings more often. Men are the complete opposite, a men expressing their feelings may be interpret by others ( men in general) as a sign of weakness, and in conclusion men dont like to talk about feelings with women, and some women do not understand why this is.

2. Relationship

Women hate it when men dont talk about the status of a relationship, because women like to know if the relationship is moving forward, men in the other hand likes to avoid conversations regarding a relationship status.

3. Being Ignored

Women hate when men ignore them, or dont pay enough attention to them, a women likes to feel special, and they hate it when a guy doesnt spent enough time with them or tells her how special she is.

4. Friendships

Some women dont like that during a relationship a man talks to female friends on the phone or hangs out with female friends, and sometimes a it can be guy-friends as well, because men together tend to act different, or might spent too much time with the guy-friends, a woman don’t mind guys spending time with their friends as long as the friends don’t start hogging all the time and attention.

5. Lying

A women hates it when a man lies, when a man lies and gets caught, theres a chance the “all men are alike” might come up.

6. Not Clean

Women hate a man without basic sense of hygiene and etiquette, a women likes to see a man well groomed and clean.

7. Past Girlfriends

A woman doesnt like to hear a man talk about past relationships or talk about how many girlsfriends he had, a man in a relationship talking to one of his ex-girlfriends is a one of the things a woman hates the most.

8. Goals

Women desire a man who knows where he is going in life as that’s an attitude of winner and women want to be around such men. They don’t want to be stuck around negative men who don’t know which way their life is going and have no plans for the future.

9. Controlling

Women do not like men who act like door mats but at the same time they do not prefer men who like everything their way all the time. Women like to be in the leader spot once in a while and prefer men who are good listeners.

10. Insecurity

Women dont like when the man is always insecure about their woman, and when they have to track every move they make and every person they talk to, it shows the woman that there is no trust in the relationship.

Perfect Man

There is no such thing as a perfect man, or even a perfect person we are all different, and when it comes to relationships we must try to understand this, always tell your partner if you dont like something, honesty is the key to long lasting relationships, dont try to change your partner because it wont get you anywhere, no one likes to be told they need to change, but simple communication can open many doors in your relationship. If you want to learn some tips about how to understand your partner better and avoid discussions, read….

Although men are not perfect, and we (including me) have many bad habits and flaws, we must try to comprehend our partners point of view, if we are aware of what our partner in relationship does not like its easier to avoid a confrontation or fight.

Theres also lots of things us men dont like about women, but if I begin making the list now I might not finish writing till….

http://lesterd2009.hubpages.com/hub/10-Things-Women-Dont-Like-About-Men

10 Traits Men Appreciate Most in Women

The rules of the mating game, evolutionary psychologists tell us, have been laid down since the earliest times and have hardly changed with the passing of centuries. What modern males and females consider attractive in the opposite sex is virtually the same set of biological and psychological factors that were held desirable by our forefathers. So, while scientists keep on speculating about the original purposes behind human behavior, there are a number of proven traits that make for that inevitable pull we call love. Here’s the top 10 list of what men fall for invariably.

Trait 10 – the right touch of neuroticism
Anxiety and neuroses have been plaguing women more than men for ages, and it’s a double-edged sword. For while highly neurotic women tend to grow dissatisfied with their relationships as compared to their quieter counterparts, there are psychologists that argue that a certain level of neuroticism makes a woman more attractive. Men find anxious women who express concern over the well-being of their males and their children preferable to ones who may seem more indifferent.

If your partner grows more anxious and you feel that it starts rocking the boat, there is a simple expedient of having more sex.

Trait 9 – the excitement of red
It’s public knowledge that the red color is regarded as the color of love, passion and sex; these associations have deep biological roots, as revealed by a study carried out by Andrew Elliot and Daniela Niesta. There are other species in the animal world that also associate red with mating.

Trait 8 – the allure of the waist and hips
The waist and hip curves have always attracted the eyes of male, but the esthetic joy of the sight has rigid mathematic ratio behind it. Occidental people commonly find the ratio of 0.7 the most attractive, meaning that the waist circumference should be 70% of the hip circumference. And while the ratio was assessed as a little higher or lower for other cultures, it’s never far off the mark. The evolutionary viewpoint suggests that a ratio lower than 0.6 can mean that the hips are too slender for a comfortable childbirth, and a significantly higher ratio can stand for excessive weight that can also cause difficulties during birth.

Trait 7 – the tale the mouth and eyes tell
There are distinct notions as to how an ideal mouth and eyes should look. A female mouth that is regarded as ideal, as stated in the study on attractive features by Michael Cunningham, should run half the width of the face.

There is plentiful experimental evidence showing that men believe large eyes to be a purely feminine feature. Biologically large eyes can be an indication of general sound health and, therefore, a witness of healthy reproduction.

Trait 6 – the beauty of the body
As the ancient caveman, on the lookout for a sexual partner, wished to estimate the nearest cavewoman’s fertility aptitude, he ran his eyes over her body that told him whether she was already pregnant or ready enough to become so. It was sufficient information for the next half-hour, and the facial features didn’t come into the picture.

As later as 2010 the same was confirmed by a study (researchers: Jaime Confer, Carin Perilloux and David Buss). When men were asked to decide the worth of a woman as a preferable short-term date by photographs, they went by her body and not by her face. A sexy body comes high as a priority.

Trait 5 – the comfort of empathy
According to the findings of a study by Daniel Nettle from the University of Newcastle, a survey of personality differences shows that the average female rates far above the average male as regards the ability to empathize. The study includes empathy in the list of traits forming agreeableness.

The researcher’s theoretic explanation of this difference runs that as of old the ability to form and build up social alliances ranked high among a woman’s priorities as that providing for the survival of her children. In the language of our time, extroverted women who show empathy and a high level of agreeableness may be held as possessing superior female qualities than those less inclined to behave in this fashion.

Trait 4 – the thrill of ovulation
Men’s reaction to an ovulating woman is habitually stronger, as shown by a 2009 study conducted by Saul Miller and Jon Maner. The phenomenon is grounded on people’s subconscious ability to detect (and react to) a large number of physical substances apart from pheromones that relate to the reproductive status of the potential sexual partner. The researchers asked men to smell soiled T-shirts of women at various stages of their menstrual period. Whenever a man smelled the shirt of an ovulating woman his testosterone level invariably went up in comparison with men whose shirts belonged to non-ovulating women.

While all men found themselves excited by an ovulating woman, the study revealed, it goes more for single blokes than for men already engaged in a relationship. It goes to show that behavior and desire can be strongly swayed by other considerations like the preference of the existing relationship to a potential new one.

Trait 3 – the value of a sacrifice
An Arizona State University research conducted by a team led by Vladas Griskevicius in 2007 concluded that women, when in a romantic mood, act more charitably than men and are more prone to self-sacrificing deeds.

On the other hand, the study discovered that charitable and self-effacing behavior is generally observed in public places, which shows that women may be aware of the value men put on that trend and unconsciously use it as additional sexual motivation.

Trait 2 – the joy of appreciation
In long-term relationships mutual appreciation often tends to deteriorate and get replaced by a demanding and criticizing attitude towards one another – which produces an adverse influence on the couple’s bond, sex life and the atmosphere that surrounds them. Marriage expert John Gottman proved in his research that mutual expression of appreciation towards your partner forms the basis of a satisfaction with the relationship.

Trait 1 – the fairness of the face
In terms of a mating strategy aimed at building a committed relationship that is meant to last, it is the woman’s face that wins the man. The University of Austin scientists who investigated into a long-term mating strategy in men found that 75% opted for a woman’s face as the factor of prime importance. This consideration was borne out by another study carried out at the Kinsey Institute – it emerged that, when having sex, men look at their partner’s face more often than women do.

Small wonder, then, that most of the time women spend on preening themselves is devoted to caring for and treating their faces, biologically and psychologically their main asset!

http://geniusbeauty.com/men-and-women/10-traits-men-appreciate-most-women/

Pepsi Max Commercial – Real men don’t cry!

Interestin​g Study …

UCLA STUDY (very interesting and short)
A study worth sharing with friends both male and female:

A study conducted by UCLA’s Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: if she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with duct tape over his mouth and a spear lodged in his chest with a bat up his ass while he is on fire.

No further studies are expected on this subject.

Women’s Shoe Sizes Conversion Chart